Archive | Etiquette Matters

Monday’s Lovely Lesson

906bc710-f2fa-4f57-a92a-aad12d974f41So a few months ago, a pair of fratty-bratty young guys moved in next door, replacing the quiet fellows who’d lived there for two years. I’d liked that couple because I neither heard nor saw them, a quality I deem ideal in neighbors. Continue Reading →

A Broad and Her Shoes: A Tale of Four Cobblers

swifty shoesI’m trying to figure out if it’s the shoe repair industry (which does entail chemicals that addle one’s brains) or Williamsblergh, but none of the four local cobblers I’ve used over the last five years have ever had my shoes ready when they’ve said they would, not even when I called ahead and they said over the phone that, Yes, of course they are ready, yes, miss, yes, come over now.

Today, upon learning once again that, no, my Rachel Comey oxfords were not ready, I got so frosty–green eyes glowing wickedly, double Ds thrust forward (this terrifies most men), lips pressed together with a Tony Soprano-wait-’em-out firmness–that my current shoe repair fellow nervously halved what I owed him.screen-shot-2016-09-21-at-2-41-04-pm (It was like that time Obi-Wan Kenobi hypnotized the storm trooper into ignoring C3PO and R2D2. Me: You will knock 50 percent off. Him: I will knock 50 percent off.) I’d feel bad except that I’m a big believer in “Whatever your job is, do it well.” Which is to say: “You snooze, I don’t pay full prize for my shoes.” I’m left wondering, though: How is this a good business practice for him? It’s noteworthy that these places go under with a suspicious regularity. Are they drug fronts? Mafia lairs? Whatever, man. I just want my kicks.

Minerva and the Balmy Bicyclist

unicycleNYC bicyclists complain all the time about drivers. I keep my mouth shut. I understand that having a car in the city is socially irresponsible and that to date there still are not enough bike lanes. But I also understand that a lot of bikers in this city ride like complete ding-a-lings. They don’t follow traffic or pedestrian laws; they veer into the road; they don’t look where they’re going; they ride shoulder to shoulder rather than in a row. I’m sympathetic to their plight–keeping it green, keeping it real–but also have to work bloody hard not to kill them. Continue Reading →

"All, everything I understand, I understand only because I love."
― Leo Tolstoy